Anticipation (noun) 1. realization in advance; foretaste; expectation or hope.
Hard to believe that spring is just days away after that wild
storm last week with its surprise blast of two feet of the back breaking white
stuff. It gave us the kind of snow that
snaps shovels and power lines, pounds sandy dunes, snatches up houses and
tosses them into the sea. Like a crafty
boxer, winter fooled us, feinted one way then caught us with one final sucker punch
just before the bell sounds for the last round of the season. Around here winter is serious stuff and often
it does not let go and leave until it absolutely, positively has to, a
houseguest putting off departure until the last minute.
But now we can at least anticipate spring finally, SPRING, the
season of anticipation, more than any other time of the year. To look ahead. Search for signs of rebirth and renewal. Wait in hope as the earth revolves to its
equinox on the 20th and then turns its face upward once again
towards the sun. In his poem “April
Prayer”, from the book “Prayers and Run-on Sentences”, the poet Stuart
Kestenbaum writes…
“Just before the green
begins there is the hint of green
a blush of color, and
the red buds thicken
the ends of the maple
branches and everything
is poised before the
start of a new world…”
Yet anticipation is a mixed emotion in the human condition, because
to anticipate we need both hope and courage.
Anticipation always carries with it two possibilities: that things will
work out as we desire, or things will work out as we fear. Anticipating spring is easy because we know,
absolutely, it is coming. The calendar can’t be denied. Flowers will push up
once again through muddy and chilly soil. Days will grow longer and
temperatures climb upward. Birds will once again sing their songs and alight, oh
so hungry, on backyard feeders.
But to anticipate a human spring as we move through the
messiness of life? This finally takes faith. A belief that somehow a power
beyond us, greater than us, is working through our lives and the life of this
world for the good, for the better, for an eternal spring in our hearts and the
world. A trust in a Divine force, beyond
all human control, which holds Creation within its embrace. Having such faithful anticipation we take a
leap into the unknown. Lonely, we
anticipate love again. Sick, we
anticipate health again. Grieving, we
anticipate recovery again. Separated, we
anticipate reconciliation again.
The old saw against such spiritual conviction is that
religious faith is finally a crutch, a faux myth that all those “God people”
lean upon. I suppose I could live this life without anticipation or faith or
hope in the God of spring. Just see this world as all chaos and randomness,
chance occurrences, luck, fate, or even a cruel roll of the dice. Some do.
But not me. I need to anticipate in hope and faith the days
ahead. I need to believe in a spirit of renewal that infuses everything, all
that matters in the world. I need
spring. I need Easter. I need a Red Sox Opening Day and my first bike ride on a
warm Sunday afternoon and a mockingbird perched on a tree in my backyard
chirping away, all of these God-given miracles declaring that better days are
in store, a new world even.
First I must anticipate it, see the spring before it
appears, envision a brand new season before the last snows have melted away. After a long winter I’m ready for such
hope. I’m willing to have faith. I have anticipation. How about you?
No comments:
Post a Comment