On my late Grandfather's 100th birthday (he lived to be
103), Grandpa's cake was topped by a word sculpture made of plastic, staked into
that confectionary masterpiece. It
read, "All things in
moderation." Or as we no doubt
teased him, using his French-Canadian immigrant's accent, "All tings in moderation." But the thought is the same.
A good life, a long life, maybe even the best life for many
(certainly for him) is one marked by being moderate. Moderate: in hungers and
appetites, in behaviors and actions, in lifestyles and beliefs. I don't know if we could ever prove Grandpa's
life philosophy contributed to his amazing longevity, but I absolutely believe
his moderation did keep him on this earth long after almost all of his peers
were gone.
Up until his early eighties he rode a bike to most of his
daily errands. He sometimes smoked, but
usually one or two and then no more. He liked a drink but almost always limited
it to a single or double. He rarely got
very angry or very vexed or very high or very low. He followed his daily
routine like clockwork, from his morning breakfast menu, to his once a day walk
to the mailbox, to an ever present book by his side.
He was moderate.
Not all agree with such a middle of the road life. As the philosopher Ralph Waldo Emerson
cheekily observed, "Moderation in all things, especially moderation."
Yet if I were to coin a phrase for the way me and far too many of my fellow
human beings live life in 2018, it might be: "Extremes in all things,
especially being extreme." We live to the extreme, extremely, in this second decade of
the 21st century.
So with our technology, it is not enough to check our phones
or social media accounts or email once or twice a day or even once an hour.
Instead we furiously clutch our technological totems and bring them everywhere:
to the dinner table, in the car as we drive, on our bed stand for an early
morning jolt, even to church. Our culture
wide F.O.M.O. (Fear Of Missing Out) drives adults in the United States
to be glued to a screen, on average, 10 hours and 39 minutes per day, according
to the media company Nielsen. Assuming 8
hours of sleep that means we have our nose to a TV, smart phone, tablet or
computer the majority of our waking lives.
That concerns me, our addiction to tech. How about you?
In our national politics, extremes also rule. Ideological
puritans on the far left and the far right self-righteously insist that their singular
"truth" is the only truth. News
is diced and sliced into left and right wing or worse, "fake". So many
leaders tweet first and think later, work not for the common good somewhere in
the middle, but instead for personal gain and ego inflation. To be a political
moderate in this environment is all but impossible. I know, because I am one. But
no one seems to want to hear from us, the majority of Americans who are, in
fact, politically moderate.
That worries me for the future of our fragile republic. How about you?
Even our playtime is marked by extremes. Children and youth are so often overbooked,
over committed and over taxed in over planned activities. Hours spent on
playing fields or buried under homework, pressured to "succeed" at
all costs. Ask a harried Mom or Dad when
was the last time the whole clan gathered as one around the dinner table. Such
gatherings are rare, as everyone rushes off into different directions. We are
captured by a cultural ethic that says life only matters when we are in
constant motion. No time for moderation: swinging in a hammock on a hot summer day,
or day dreaming as we look at the clouds or claiming an unplanned day or a wide
open weekend.
That worries and exhausts me. How about you?
So here's a moderate proposal. Be moderate.
Seek balance in your one God-given, precious life. Work but play too.
Put down your phone tonight and look up at the stars in the sky. Consider what
is the greatest good, not just for folks like you, but also for the rest of
God's children in this world. Get enough sleep. Smile more and frown less and
laugh at yourself and the absurdity of life, daily. Indulge your appetites but seek moderation. I know that's all kind of moderate. But we must start somewhere.
And thanks for the advice, Grandpa.
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