"Instruction does
much, but encouragement does everything." --Johann von Goethe,
author
"Knock their socks off John!"
Thirty years ago this month I was about to set off on a road
trip for my very first job interview. Graduate school was ending. The real
world and my future called and boy: was I scared, gripped by anxiety. Sweaty
palms. Racing heart. Did I have the right stuff? Would I come across as a
confident candidate or a nervous neophyte?
Or maybe get lost in those pre-GPS days as I drove 110 miles west to the
far away land of suburban Connecticut?
Could I do this? All I needed was just a little
encouragement.
Not more instruction. My textbook days were over. Not a
critique about how my suit was too wrinkled or my tie too loud. Not unsolicited advice from a wizened elder
who supposed they knew a thing or two. I just wanted someone to remind me that
I could do it, that I had the talent within me and all I needed was to remember
this.
Then an old friend and mentor, Sandy, leaned into my car and said words that
have stuck with me, even now, three decades later. "You are going to be great. You are
ready. Knock their socks off, John!" And then I did! Nailed that
interview. Got that job, my first in my thirty years as a pastor. I'll never
forget what a difference her belief in me, made. She made me believe in me. She
gave me courage.
That's what "encourage" means: to give heart. To remind someone than they are always so
much more than they might imagine. That they actually do have the right
stuff. All that is needed is for a
fellow soul to speak encouraging words, to love another so much that we want
the best for them. It is amazing what a difference just a little encouragement makes
in the life of a fellow child of God, in my life, in your life too, I'll bet. It
is amazing to consider what happens when a child of God lacks for someone to
encourage them, or worse, is surrounded by folks who tear down or put down or
dis-courage.
I re-learned this life truth last weekend when I was blessed
to be a judge in a local student film festival sponsored by a community arts
center. Forty teams of budding high
school film students submitted short films. It was my job,
along with fellow judges, to watch all those movies and then offer opinions
about which films deserved to be honored.
The best part of the festivities came after all the awards, as young people
mingled in a post-festival reception. There were smiles and laughter but most
of all, a palpable atmosphere of young artists ready to soar, needing only one
thing.
Encouragement.
A kind word. An
engaged conversation. An adult to take the time and let them know that they
just might be the next Alfred Hitchcock or Steven Spielberg. Who knows?! There is nothing like watching a person's
face light up with joy and confidence when all you've done is offer
encouragement. Like how you were encouraged once: when you thought you could
not get that job or hit that baseball or ask that person out for a date or publish
that story or become who God made you to be. But then someone gave you courage
and...you did it. YOU DID IT!
I know this spiritual advice seems so obvious, so simple, so
clear. But in our far too often cold and
even cruel world, a world forever focused on results and winning at the
detriment of participation and effort, encouragement can get lost and forgotten
as a virtue. By youth coaches who berate and yell at the kids, believe a win on
the field at all costs is actually more important that nurturing young souls.
By politicians who rip folks to shreds on social media and gleefully encourage
followers to tear apart anyone who gets in the way. Even by religions that
worry far too much about "sin" and condemning the "sinner"
and far too little about the essential God given goodness within each of us, within
all of us.
If only we would take the time to offer encouragement: what
a better world it would be.
So this week: encourage someone. Just one soul. A son or
daughter or grandchild or spouse. A player on a team you coach or a new
employee at the office or a struggling friend who needs one other person to
care. Encouragement is so easy. It is free of charge. It is always heart
shaping. Someone once encouraged you. Remember?
Now go and do likewise. You can do it!
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