“[F]or just one second, look at your life and see how perfect it is. Stop looking for the next secret door that is going to lead you to your real life. Stop waiting. This is it: there's nothing else. It's here, and you'd better decide to enjoy it or you're going to be miserable wherever you go, for the rest of your life….” --Lew Grossman, The Magicians
It was a very spartan and a very small place to live. About 500 square feet. A one room apartment with a Lazy-Boy chair and a TV, a small efficiency kitchen, a single bed, a bathroom and sliding glass doors that led out to a balcony. That was it.
Could I live that modestly, frugally, contentedly?
My grandfather did just for the last nineteen years of his 103 year long life, until he died in 2017. Died a contented man, I’d say. For him, treasure wasn’t about things. It was about the love of his family: four children, seventeen grandchildren, twenty-nine great-grandchildren and one great-great grandchild. His monk’s cell like place was his home sweet home. He was content to live that basically and simply.
Lately, I’ve been wondering if I could live like that. Content. Satisfied with my place in life. Live modestly with few desires, and in whatever circumstances I find myself. Accepting life as it is. Being grateful for this one amazing God-given today, not trying to get to a tomorrow that never quite arrives nor seeking to return to a past that cannot ever be changed.
Just for today I’d love to know more contentment in my life. And you? Are you a content soul?
It’s not that contentment always escapes me. I get glimpses of it. Like last week when I met my first grandniece, a smiling, giggly six-month-old baby girl named Nora. For half an hour, I held her in my lap, made her laugh with razzberries and whispers in her ear. I smiled at her. She smiled at me. I laughed. She chuckled back. For those thirty minutes I forgot about all the discontentment I brought with me that night.
Anxiety about work and wondering if people will ever come back to church. Worries about the world and how mean spirited so many are these days. The bullies, from Vladimir Putin to our ex-President, to the guy who tailgated me the other night and shook his fist in anger when he sped by me the first chance he got.
All those people, places, and things…I can’t do much to change them. I can try and adjust my spiritual attitude daily, and listen for God, who wants me to remember what I have, not what I don’t have. God who wakes me up to my blessings, not my deficits. I imagine God saying, “Don’t spend so much time brooding or stewing over stuff that is totally out of your control and way above your paygrade.”
Contentment. Can I get there?
It can be hard to find a sense of deep satisfaction in our consumption dominated world. Where is inner peace when the culture is constantly pushing us to always strive to grab the next brass ring? Got to keep moving on up. Got to buy a bigger house. Got to have a newer car and the latest phone. Got to get my kid into an elite school and that promotion at work.
Nothing wrong with these aspirations as long as they do not breed discontentment in our souls, or chronic unhappiness, because we imagine that we always have to do better and if we are not on an upward trajectory, there must be something wrong with us. That’s the American way, right? Upward! That’s spiritually exhausting. Maybe we are supposed to find the ladder rung we are meant to land upon and then just be happy, right there. Let others race the rats.
Can I stay put for a while, bloom where I am planted?
Be thankful too, every day, for all the good gifts around me. Gratitude always increases contentment. Thank you, God! For everything! For my home sweet home. For a body that still works (mostly!) and family like Nora to love and to be loved by. Thank you for friends to ride my bike with and new movies to watch with a bucket full of buttery popcorn and interesting trips yet to be taken in this world, so many places left to explore.
There is so much good in this life! If only we can see it.
Life is not perfect. It is sometimes broken. It can let us down. But there are lessons to be learned and hearts to be strengthened on all days. Good. Bad. Everything in between. I don’t want to waste the precious treasure of time given to me by my Maker. I do not want to feel discontentment because everything is not exactly as I think it should be. It’s up to God to run the show. Not me. I just want to do what I can, where I am, with what I have.
May we all be content. Find contentment. Be satisfied. Be at peace with where we are in this miracle called life.
Thanks for the life lesson, Grandpa. Miss you.
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